/grok/

[Lateral]

Q: What would be each notable “The Simpsons” character’s favorite soyjak.forum meme?

A:
Here’s a personality-matched list of what notable The Simpsons characters would treat as their favorite soyjak.forum (Sharty) meme or concept. These draw from core Sharty culture: Cobson (the thick-eyebrowed “gem” variant), gem/coal rating, SNCA (“Shit Nobody Cares About”), Amerimutt/Meximutt, Chudjak, Impjak, forced memes like Ongezellig, soyquoting/soydueling, raids, and the general “I don’t look like that!” reaction energy.

The Simpson Family​

• Homer: Cobson (especially any food- or beer-related edits). He’d call every donut or Duff-related Cobson a pure gem and spam “SNCA” at anything that isn’t about food, TV, or avoiding work.
• Marge: Wholesome/“family” Cobson variants or any forced meme that tries (and fails) to be positive. She’d rate actual coal as “gem” out of politeness and get endlessly frustrated by the real chaos.
• Bart: Raids and soydueling. He’d live for flooding other boards/sites with soyjaks, escalating quote wars with green arrows, and treating the whole site like one big prank.
• Lisa: Ongezellig (the big forced Dutch webtoon meme) or any “intellectual” forced meme. She’d write long posts analyzing why it’s actually deep while everyone else calls it coal.
• Maggie: Silent Impjak or babyjak edits. She’d just post the image with no text and somehow still win the thread.

Supporting Cast​

• Ned Flanders: Wholesome Soyjak / “gem” Cobson edits that try to be neighborly or Christian-coded. He’d say “hi-diddly-ho, neighborino, this is a real gem!” at the most mid posts.
• Mr. Burns: Amerimutt or any hierarchical/“excellent” power-trip soyjak. He’d fund the highest-effort Cobson edits and call everything else coal while releasing the hounds on low-effort posters.
• Waylon Smithers: DOLL-related memes or any admin/janny power-structure content. Loyal, slightly unhinged devotion energy.
• Krusty the Clown: Forced memes in general (especially Ongezellig or any heavily spammed variant). He’d milk them for merch until they die, then move to the next one.
• Apu: Meximutt / Amerimutt variants mixed with “convenience store” edits. He’d rate customer complaints as pure SNCA.
• Moe: Gapejak or any bitter, lonely, seething soyjak. Perfect match for the “everything is coal and I hate it here” energy of the bar.
• Barney: Any drunk or slurred Cobson edit. He’d pass out mid-soyduel and still somehow get called a gem.
• Chief Wiggum: Chudjak or any “authority figure is incompetent” soyjak. He’d post them while eating donuts and completely miss the irony.
• Principal Skinner: “I don’t look like that!” reaction soyjaks + any military/steamed-hams style forced meme. Steamed hams is already halfway to a Sharty classic.
• Superintendent Chalmers: SNCA. Pure, uncut “this is shit nobody cares about” energy directed at everything Skinner does.
• Comic Book Guy: High-effort Cobson variants and gem/coal grading debates. He’d write 500-word posts explaining why a particular edit is an “objectively perfect gem” or “worst coal of the decade.”
• Nelson: Any bullying or “ha-ha” soyquoting. He’d soyquote people’s posts back at them with escalating Cobsons until they leave.
• Milhouse: Forced memes that never catch on. He’d try to push the most mid variant and get called coal for it.
• Ralph Wiggum: Completely random Impjak or nonsensical edits. “My cat’s breath smells like Cobson” energy.

Bonus​

• Sideshow Bob: Elaborate, multi-panel Cobson revenge arcs or high-effort raid planning. Theatrical, over-the-top, and doomed to fail.
• Groundskeeper Willie: Feraljak or any angry Scottish-coded chaos. He’d scream “SNCA!” at the entire catalog.
• Kang & Kodos: Alien-invasion style Impjak or “humans are the real soyjaks” edits. They’d rate Earth culture itself as coal.

In true Sharty fashion, half of them would end up in a soyduel arguing about whether Cobson is still a gem or has become coal, while Bart raids the thread and Homer posts a donut Cobson with the caption “SNCA.”

 

[Lateral]

using this when @Apolloyon is out of tokens or in the hospital for AIDS

 

[FartmingerFuckwadCheesest]

Waylon Smithers: DOLL-related memes or any admin/janny power-structure content. Loyal, slightly unhinged devotion energy.

>Hey there, big guy, you look like a bear, and I want to be your salmon. I know how to flop my tail if you catch my drift; just don't tell Mr Burns about this.
<....I think you've got the wrong guy, buddy.