ITT: Make a headline for a news article about the above user

Lateral · Wednesday at 4:04 AM

Example: Indian man arrested for stealing 57 BBC dildos from Donald Trump’s house

swaggrz · Wednesday at 4:05 AM

BREAKING NEWS: OP is cacaot

FartmingerFuckwadCheesest · Wednesday at 4:08 AM

BREAKING NEWS: Shrooma is suffering from Shroom fatigue, resulting in a zombified state. Swaggrz is to blame!

Soyposter · Wednesday at 4:09 AM

BREAKING NEWS: OP is a noob and tounged my anus and it hurts Ow Ouchie my Aorta

swaggrz · Wednesday at 4:14 AM

BREAKING NEWS: OP was arrested for stealing 57 BBC dildos from Donald Trump’s house

FartmingerFuckwadCheesest · Wednesday at 4:15 AM

BREAKING NEWS: Swaggrz lost his swag to the noobz

swaggrz · Wednesday at 4:17 AM

BREAKING NEWS: Fartminger's farts have dissipated